Every now and then I look at the ol' Facebook and see a post from one of my fellows in Portland where it seems the rents are just going bananas. "You can't find a 3 bedroom house for less that $1500 now, IT'S TERRIBLE! And the houses aren't even that good!!!!"
Oh my. I don't even have words for how much I chuckle at this. I do empathize with the out of my control feeling of increasing rents. When I lived at 3614 North Michigan when my rent went from $200-$250 I was angry. I resented my slumlord, and yes, he was a true slumlord, for daring to ask more for his house he bought for $18k back in the 80's and did nothing to keep it up. It was indeed falling down.
And yes, my rent was less than $300. When I had my storefront on Mississippi Avenue, the rent there was 'friend rate', $300. Prospective shop owners would ask me this every week and I would tell them and watch them turn beet red with frustration. I gloated, a little "eff you" to the new yuppie invaders.
Wow, those last 3 paragraphs sucked.
My last year in Portland I moved to 1818 SE Clinton. Had a 900 square foot one bedroom beautiful apartment for $875. It was the first attempt I made at living like a grownup. It felt really good. The management company kept the place up and were kind and mature. I realized with my cheap flophouse style of living I simply was no longer happy. I had fallen into the trap of looking for cheap rent and that being the priority. I always had weird and rather abusive dynamics with my landlords and I was always stressed out and resented paying the rent and oddly enough I was always......broke. Yes, even with my $250 room on Michigan Avenue I was broke. I had no savings. I worked 4 to 5 days a week. I wasn't happy. That's indicated by my sense of superiority towards my new neighbors. "See! I'm cool! I pay less than you ever will! I'm an artist!" Oy, that's gross.
Today where I am writing this blog from I pay $925 for my bright little room in Brooklyn. That is cheap for my neighborhood. I looked on the Portland Craigslist and within 5 minutes found a studio apartment near my much missed Mississippi neighborhood for less than my room here. Oh I wish. It is a goal to live alone, live better, and I'm walking towards that goal every day. And besides, I need to be in NY, I love my life here so it's worth it to me.
But what is so new to me is this: When I was hooked on cheap rent I was always stressed out. Stressed out in one of the mellowest cities in the USA and scraping together that little $250 rent and watching my checking account hover above zero the first of the month. Now I'm paying 4x that (I have a shared rehearsal space that cost another C-note) and I live in a city that is notoriously stressful, rude, nasty, and yet I feel calm most times. I make my rent with ease and have some money building up in the bank. And here's the thing: people have this illusion that you earn more money in NYC relative to other cities. No, I'm still earning roughly the same amount. It's eeking up as I focus on earning better but really, my taxes say it loud and clear: I'm on the cusp of poverty level when you look at the numbers.
So what has changed?
My habits first of all. I worked hard to give up all that resentment of people with money. I was $28k in debt when I left Portland. No, I can't blame Visa or the 1% people on that. I did that. I learned to pay attention to what I do bring in and how I spend.
When I lived in Portland one day it dawned on me I was giving the Fresh Pot on Mississippi Avenue $300 a month. Yes, $3600 a year. Coffee and croissant plus tip 2x a day=$10 X 30 days. Hollow calories and yes, I was getting fat. I make my coffee at home now and it's better than any coffee shop. I reserve the coffee shop for meeting friends in and hanging out now. It's a treat, not a habit. And trust me, it was a tough habit to break.
I also ate out an average of....3 meals a day. Again, great way to stay fat and broke. A great way to never value oneself. Making food can be a spiritual experience the same way making music, love, starting a business can be. If I'm not cooking daily, I'm missing out on time being alone or with a loved one. I'm probably rushing about not smelling the roses. I was always in a hurry in those lazy days, I like being busy but I identify it as this: I liked to look busy. I liked to think I was busy. It seemed like I was getting things done yet, I never completed 1/3 of my projects. The sense of urgency is really not necessary and will never get me anywhere.
And that was just it. Coffee and bread 2x a day with no nutrients, no spending plan and no clear goals equals vagueness. I got high on "vagueing out". I could sit in my cold, dirty Michigan Avenue house and "be right" about my yuppie scum neighbors. I could hang out and complain about the world, a world I had no part in changing. Depression is the drug and I was hooked. Thing is, I don't thin anyone really likes being hooked. I didn't, that's why I was depressed. So I'm grateful to the folks around me at the time who were honest with me and led me to believe I could do better. Those who said "you know, you complain a lot, and you get sick a lot!"
Really it came down to not having a spending plan. Taking the attitude of "how do I control my money and not be controlled by money?" Like a friend said when I was at my financial bottom: "If you can't manage thirty bucks right now then you can forget about managing $30,000 let alone a million. You will be broke in no time."
I was a part of this soul band with some young folks when I lived there. They asked me about the rent and I told them. Their eyes lit up. "Cool!!!!" I said: "young men, shoot higher, this low rent business is a trap. Have a dream or you will turn 40 like me looking for the next abusive and tense situation to move in merely cause it's cheap andYOU ARE NOT CHEAP!"
I think I've broken the cycle. It's taken a decision to do so and a lot of practice and an enormous amount of love and support from my friends. Like I said, I empathize with my Pacific West Coastians, I don't enjoy feeling out of control of my destiny. I hated hearing people say "if you are not part of the solution you are part of the problem". I still don't buy that. That was the rhetoric in my punk house days. I like to think of it like this: "If I am not happy the problem is me." I'm a human being. I'm good at solving problems. That is what we do best. If I can solve my problem with the help of others, I can help others solve their problem too. And I do love to help.
Beginning to think.....it's all just a state of mind.
J
Oh my. I don't even have words for how much I chuckle at this. I do empathize with the out of my control feeling of increasing rents. When I lived at 3614 North Michigan when my rent went from $200-$250 I was angry. I resented my slumlord, and yes, he was a true slumlord, for daring to ask more for his house he bought for $18k back in the 80's and did nothing to keep it up. It was indeed falling down.
And yes, my rent was less than $300. When I had my storefront on Mississippi Avenue, the rent there was 'friend rate', $300. Prospective shop owners would ask me this every week and I would tell them and watch them turn beet red with frustration. I gloated, a little "eff you" to the new yuppie invaders.
Wow, those last 3 paragraphs sucked.
My last year in Portland I moved to 1818 SE Clinton. Had a 900 square foot one bedroom beautiful apartment for $875. It was the first attempt I made at living like a grownup. It felt really good. The management company kept the place up and were kind and mature. I realized with my cheap flophouse style of living I simply was no longer happy. I had fallen into the trap of looking for cheap rent and that being the priority. I always had weird and rather abusive dynamics with my landlords and I was always stressed out and resented paying the rent and oddly enough I was always......broke. Yes, even with my $250 room on Michigan Avenue I was broke. I had no savings. I worked 4 to 5 days a week. I wasn't happy. That's indicated by my sense of superiority towards my new neighbors. "See! I'm cool! I pay less than you ever will! I'm an artist!" Oy, that's gross.
Today where I am writing this blog from I pay $925 for my bright little room in Brooklyn. That is cheap for my neighborhood. I looked on the Portland Craigslist and within 5 minutes found a studio apartment near my much missed Mississippi neighborhood for less than my room here. Oh I wish. It is a goal to live alone, live better, and I'm walking towards that goal every day. And besides, I need to be in NY, I love my life here so it's worth it to me.
But what is so new to me is this: When I was hooked on cheap rent I was always stressed out. Stressed out in one of the mellowest cities in the USA and scraping together that little $250 rent and watching my checking account hover above zero the first of the month. Now I'm paying 4x that (I have a shared rehearsal space that cost another C-note) and I live in a city that is notoriously stressful, rude, nasty, and yet I feel calm most times. I make my rent with ease and have some money building up in the bank. And here's the thing: people have this illusion that you earn more money in NYC relative to other cities. No, I'm still earning roughly the same amount. It's eeking up as I focus on earning better but really, my taxes say it loud and clear: I'm on the cusp of poverty level when you look at the numbers.
So what has changed?
My habits first of all. I worked hard to give up all that resentment of people with money. I was $28k in debt when I left Portland. No, I can't blame Visa or the 1% people on that. I did that. I learned to pay attention to what I do bring in and how I spend.
When I lived in Portland one day it dawned on me I was giving the Fresh Pot on Mississippi Avenue $300 a month. Yes, $3600 a year. Coffee and croissant plus tip 2x a day=$10 X 30 days. Hollow calories and yes, I was getting fat. I make my coffee at home now and it's better than any coffee shop. I reserve the coffee shop for meeting friends in and hanging out now. It's a treat, not a habit. And trust me, it was a tough habit to break.
I also ate out an average of....3 meals a day. Again, great way to stay fat and broke. A great way to never value oneself. Making food can be a spiritual experience the same way making music, love, starting a business can be. If I'm not cooking daily, I'm missing out on time being alone or with a loved one. I'm probably rushing about not smelling the roses. I was always in a hurry in those lazy days, I like being busy but I identify it as this: I liked to look busy. I liked to think I was busy. It seemed like I was getting things done yet, I never completed 1/3 of my projects. The sense of urgency is really not necessary and will never get me anywhere.
And that was just it. Coffee and bread 2x a day with no nutrients, no spending plan and no clear goals equals vagueness. I got high on "vagueing out". I could sit in my cold, dirty Michigan Avenue house and "be right" about my yuppie scum neighbors. I could hang out and complain about the world, a world I had no part in changing. Depression is the drug and I was hooked. Thing is, I don't thin anyone really likes being hooked. I didn't, that's why I was depressed. So I'm grateful to the folks around me at the time who were honest with me and led me to believe I could do better. Those who said "you know, you complain a lot, and you get sick a lot!"
Really it came down to not having a spending plan. Taking the attitude of "how do I control my money and not be controlled by money?" Like a friend said when I was at my financial bottom: "If you can't manage thirty bucks right now then you can forget about managing $30,000 let alone a million. You will be broke in no time."
I was a part of this soul band with some young folks when I lived there. They asked me about the rent and I told them. Their eyes lit up. "Cool!!!!" I said: "young men, shoot higher, this low rent business is a trap. Have a dream or you will turn 40 like me looking for the next abusive and tense situation to move in merely cause it's cheap andYOU ARE NOT CHEAP!"
I think I've broken the cycle. It's taken a decision to do so and a lot of practice and an enormous amount of love and support from my friends. Like I said, I empathize with my Pacific West Coastians, I don't enjoy feeling out of control of my destiny. I hated hearing people say "if you are not part of the solution you are part of the problem". I still don't buy that. That was the rhetoric in my punk house days. I like to think of it like this: "If I am not happy the problem is me." I'm a human being. I'm good at solving problems. That is what we do best. If I can solve my problem with the help of others, I can help others solve their problem too. And I do love to help.
Beginning to think.....it's all just a state of mind.
J
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